Because of you god Eros

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Because of you god Eros
I often cursed my flesh,
so often I despised it
so often I denied it…
 

In the prime of my life,
with hope in my sight,
on the top of my strength
in the best of my health ;
in vain I asked, in vain I hoped,
in body only were you overflowed
and you knew no other gods
and you lived your selfish lots.

How are you and what you do ?
Are you pleased to come to see
how my curse got hold of me;
how I'm sweeping fallen leaves
sweeping all the memories
that could have been true with you
if besides yourself
some other gods you knew…

You did scorch and set on fire,
you came nymphs to hire,
to cause all the suffering
cos i was inclined to think
that you dwell not only in flesh
and you can't be bought for cash…

I believed it’s worth the fight,
to take flesh into the light
while the nymphs did what it takes
lured me - into swampy lakes;
Beautiful and fiery hetaeras
offered me their stunning body
and I tasted them and realized
that they are acting it to everybody.
 

When the things got even worse
I went to the amazons
asking - pleading for a family and sons ;
to commit myself to one
and my last attempt was done.

Had I died in true embrace
in the deepest of the lakes,
or just killed by amazons
trampled by a stud of horse ;
dying for a beautiful hetaera
would have been so fine,
but in true love - not in wine.

All who lived in you god Eros
were so friendly and inviting,
yet the beauty of the flesh
brought a loud and crying bash,
when you banned the other gods
from your dwelling place and lots .

Now I’m sweeping fallen leaves,
sweeping all my memories,
sweeping them in autumn late
and I ceased to fight or hate;
but I hope you been caught too
by the things you always do
and your destiny and lots,
make you cry - for other gods.